Ellesha has channelled her experience of Body Dysmorphic Disorder into her fashion photography as part of her MA.
“I’m Ellesha, a fashion photography MA student. I had been struggling with body dysmorphia on and off for many years. When I moved to London I felt a pressure to look a certain way and my body dysmorphia took over my whole life, to the point that I couldn’t leave my flat for days because I was obsessed with what I looked like. It effected my studies, my job, my friendships and relationships I felt like it had taken every part of me that I once loved.”
“I wanted to express the way I was feeling through my art. I find that self portraiture is the best way to convey what I’m truly feeling and it expresses a vulnerability that I can only get from being the model.”
“I began by getting 3D scanned whilst wearing lingerie, this was daunting but I felt most at one with my body this way. I then manipulated the images in various ways to express the way my mind felt about my body. The results became un-human and alien like as I distorted myself to be unrecognisable.”
“As I began to work on the ideas, I heavily researched the disorder and the aspect of mind body dualism meaning I was able to better understand my situation and find ways of slowly accepting myself.”
“I hope that by making this work I can show that body dysmorphic disorder can have hugely devastating effects on the everyday life and completely change the perception we have of ourselves. But to show that no one is alone in experiencing it and there is a light at the end of tunnel.”
Follow Ellesha’s work here:
Instagram: @elldoubledaze
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